You talk about a cool trip you took last weekend and he has to share one that’s even better. He’ll eventually embarrass the hell out of himself and his friends won’t let him live it down. Crystal Crowder Crystal Crowder is a freelance writer and blogger.He has to come up with something more impressive than anything you have to say. You know that little voice in the back of your mind that’s constantly analyzing every moment when you start flirting with a guy? Except when they feel intimidated, the little voice is so loud they can’t maintain a conversation. She's a tech geek at heart, but loves telling it like it is when it comes to love, beauty and style.Many guys – especially introverts – can find this upsetting or discomforting.He may feel as though he’s going to have to put on a performance in order to keep up with her.Being told “You’re too intimidating” is incredibly aggravating to women.After all, women are encouraged to be assertive, accomplished and independent; being told that they’re “intimidating” sounds like they’re being told to take all of that back and pretend to be something less than what they are. Are geek guys finding a woman’s accomplishments to be somehow threatening? Because “intimidating” is so subject to personal interpretation, I thought it was best to go to the source: geek guys.Women who have nerdy interests are frequently less traditionally “feminine”.
It’s in the way you hold yourself and interact with those around you. At this point, he’s just trying to downgrade how awesome you are. It’s petty and stupid, but some guys think this makes them look better. Do you suddenly feel like the exchange has turned into an escalating tennis match? Remember, the right ones stick around to learn who you really are.
Showing genuine interest or honest appreciation in his accomplishments or hobbies can also help him overcome feelings of “What could she possibly see in me?
” And I do mean genuine; shy, geeky guys are perpetually concerned that people are secretly making fun of them.
This is not to say that incredibly beautiful women will only go for the model-handsome mind you – look at Christina Hendricks are the one making the first move, they may feel as though they will be in constant competition with other men: ones with better jobs, fatter wallets, movie-star smiles, and abs you could do laundry on.
Your instinctive response may be to play down your looks, and while this can work – there’s a reason why the “beautiful-after-all” trope exists; everyone likes the idea of the librarian who’s secretly model-gorgeous – it’s ultimately putting the responsibility on you.
There is no reason why you should try to force yourself to be someone you’re not in order to meet somebody else’s criteria.